Wise-Elder-In-Training

After some time away, let's try a new tack. My previous post had the fictional Bijonbo giving an Invocation at a Toastmasters meeting. Inspired by my own fictional character, I decided to actually join the Toastmasters club at my work, where I gave the following "Icebreaker" speech:

Hi. My name is Brian Fleming and I am a ridiculous middle-aged man. Someday when I grow up I hope to be someone that people come to for advice -- a wise elder. So every day I am learning new things, studying the ancients, and practicing my trade. But I am not a wise elder yet. I am a wise-elder-in-training.

I work in raw materials purchasing here in Smyrna. I joined Nissan 5 years ago. At that time I was a member of Nashville Toastmasters. It was good for me. It kept me in the game during a period of low employment. It helped my communication and interview skills. And I learned a lot just listening to the other speeches. Now those are some of the same reasons I am joining Toastmasters again.

But I have a more specific goal in mind this time. I want to practice talking about the things of learned so I can help people. So I can give counsel. So I can become a wise elder someday. Last time I made it half way through the Competent Communicator manual. I couldn’t find it in the attic so I have to start over again. But that’s OK. I’ll give the Icebreaker Speech, I’ll Get to the Point, and use Vocal Variety. You can count my ahs and give me feedback. That will be very helpful. But all the while I will be sharing things I’ve learned. Because when you teach someone, you learn twice. You will be my captive audience. And maybe you will learn a few things from me along the way. But I will be listening to your speeches too. And I look forward to learning from you.

Some topics I’ve been studying lately that might come out in my speeches involve interpersonal skills, coaching & counseling techniques, and critical thinking. Before joining Nissan I got my second masters degree, a Master of Liberal Arts & Science, with a concentration in Ethics at Vanderbilt. Since then I’ve been going to Socrates Café meetings where I challenge the others, and myself, to think clearly by asking questions. Over the years, I volunteered in a variety of ways to help others, including youth basketball coaching, teaching Junior Achievement, and serving as President of a purchasing professional association. But it never felt like enough. Now I facilitate SMART Recovery support group meetings with people struggling with addictive behaviors. And I serve as a chatline agent to help people dealing with oppressive religious beliefs. For those last two roles, I’m studying things like Non-Violent Communication, Motivational Interviewing, and using Curiosity to turn Conflict into Creativity.

In addition to these fancy things I’m learning, there’s also my life experiences to draw upon. I’ve been married to the same woman for 32 years and we raised to 2 sons who are now 28 and 26. So I can tell you about sons but I know nothing about daughters. I helped my parents through their final stages so I can offer my help with that. I can give advice on free-throw shooting technique and investing. I can teach you how to play guitar but not how to cook.

And then there's my work experience. Before Nissan I had several purchasing & supply management roles. But I also had the misfortune of getting laid off, so I can give advice on job search and networking. Here at Nissan I work in raw material purchasing but I don’t buy anything. I help the buyers adjust prices for raw material economics. I also negotiate and arrange stainless steel purchases with our suppliers, but we don’t use it in our own Nissan plants. So there is a fair amount of advice-giving and training I provide.

But I’m not there yet. I still have a lot to learn to become a wise elder someday. I am a wise-elder-in-training. I am still learning how to express myself clearly, how to listen to my feelings and those of others, how to bridge generational gaps, how to relate to people of all walks of life, how to understand. And so on. So thank you for giving me the opportunity to express my ideas in this supportive environment. I hope I can teach you a few things and I am looking forward to learning from you. Because I am a wise-elder-in-training.